One rainy morning in 1993, I was trying to decide whether to continue to fight my debilitating depression or end my life, when I happened to see an orange book with gold lettering in my bookshelf, The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying by Soygal Rinpoche.
I picked up the book and began reading.
I discovered there was a big difference between my ordinary mind, the one considering suicide, and my Buddha nature, the sky-like nature of our mind, which is open and limitless and the birthright of every human being.
When I saw those words, that my birthright was Buddha nature, something shifted in me and I found the courage to stay and fight. Now I needed to learn to meditate.
Thus began the adventure I would write about in Choosing To Be, in which I learned to sit with and observe my debilitating thoughts, to make peace with my self-hatred and gently turn it toward self-compassion.